From the beginning of this semester, I feel like I'm starting to remember everything that happens throughout my life for 19 years. It is not that long, mind you, but after all those flashback, I DO notice one thing: my memory is currently working terribly bad. I mean, I'm known of having a good, if not sharp, memory, and I'm forgetting almost everything, ever since I come to Singapore. God knows that this might be the side effect of reading too many manga, playing too many games, not learning at all, barely socializing with people, etc. Basically, I guess I haven't stimulate my brain enough, that my memory seems to be seeping out of my brain. Well, at least I should be thankful that I have started to recollect some of them.
I just feel that it is kinda funny that I forgot those things. From my recollected memory, I remember that I wanted to treasure those memories. Or rather, I wanted to treasure the feelings that I felt at that time. For those reading these, it's not about love or anything, mind you. I guess, it's more like I'm searching pieces of myself through pieces of memories that I have lost. Somehow, when I think about it, the current "me" is very different from the past "me". Sure, people change, but people won't change in such a drastic manner that they forgot about their past.
Well, we can say that I'm a bit confused on my self-identity. It seems that the current "me" is just a mask that I used once upon a time ago. Just like those stories in the manga, I guess the mask has either replace my own face, or the mask has gain its own personality, and it replace my identity without me knowing it, until now. I just can't shake the feeling that what I have lost, are many, and they all are important for me. It is the feeling of those moments, that I miss the most. I just can hope that those pieces of memory will come back to me, slowly but surely.
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